Oh shit, it’s another return. What are we on, return.. thrice?

I know, I know. I don’t need to hear it. I am aware I keep promising a return, that you get that tasty content that you constantly crave from the tasty flower that is Kiss of Beth’s. This time however feels different, like I actually have something to say.. almost like, dare I say, the passion has returned. It couldn’t be, could it?

I’m sure you’re screaming, Beth, what have you been doing for the past year and not posting your trauma and feelings on a (mr) world wide blog… and the answer is living, truly living my guys. I took time to actually breathe and relax with my partner, friends, bands and cats. Don’t get me wrong, I am still learning to actually switch off and do nothing but I am feeling FAR less guilty about doing so. I fucked off to a couple of festivals, few holidays… all in all, was pretty cool for 2024.

But I guess, new year, new me? I started a new job in an industry that I have been desperate to break into for fucking years and years. So now I am sat on the train back from my big girl music industry job in London as an A&R Account Manager, so I guess I can find time once a month to write some shit on the commute home ehy! (Also enjoy the cheeky job drop there… I’m proud of myself, shut up)

So, today is shitty old blue Monday, which is the wankest day of the year. Today is the day we are most likely to look in our mirrors and go… I am not where I should be in life.

So that’s what we are going to be discussing today, where you should be really be at this point in your life. We are going to break it down, get deep into and really work it out, together!

At 18 thought I wouldn’t be alive any more, I thought the same from the ages of 26-29. Here I am at 33, not really sure where I should be anymore, and you know what that’s more than ok. Most people would say people my age should be married, couple kids, pets, house and a solid career path. Should I subscribe what society believes someone my age should be at?

NO, BECAUSE I AM ON NO-ONES TIMELINE BUT MY OWN

That counts for you also! What do you mean you’re sad about the things you haven’t achieved at your age? Who said you had to achieve it by that specific time frame? You got your whole life to achieve anything you want, you don’t have to be hitting it by the time you hit 30.

I literally chose to blow up my whole life at 29. I was married, I was unhappy, I was depressed and having anxiety attacks everyday and doing some real shady shit whilst also being mentally torn apart by the person that was meant to love me. I got divorced and then I really started living.

It was the best thing I ever fucking did.

I met the love of my life, have explored the world with him and live in our sweet little home with our cats. I recorded albums and singles with my band, we toured the UK, made a fuck ton of friends in the scene, play some insane and incredible venues and now we are working on releasing album 2. If I wanted to listen to society, I would have done all of these during my 20’s when you’re “meant” to have fun and dream. I have met some incredible people, gained a whole new family and finally got into the mother-fuckin’ music industry.

Don’t get me wrong, its good to have goals and objectives in your life but you cannot compare yourself to where someone else is at the same age as you or doing the same job as you. I hear so often from the people I love “oh I am not as far as long as this person in what we are both doing, that must mean I am no good at it” or “I can’t believe I am single, no-one will want me at my age“

Our journey’s aren’t the same, not one of us. You are doing great, no matter what you’re doing my home slice. We need to realise we put so much pressure on ourselves to be exactly where everyone else thinks we should be. Live each day, doing what makes you happy and what moves you forward in your own growth. Growth isn’t linear. Growth works differently for different people and we all learn and develop at our pace.

The same with healing, healing looks and feels different for everyone. Everyone is healing or needing to heal from something. Some people active seek out to fix what is hurting them, some take longer to know the issue and focus on how to make the issue better. I recommend therapy to EVERYONE. Honestly, I don’t think without my awesome therapist I would have survived my mental break down 4 years ago. (Big ups Tim who dealt with my terrible humour as a coping mechanism)

You need to celebrate YOUR wins, because they ARE wins. Doesn’t matter what others think, if it feels like a win… It’s a win. Sometime’s I celebrate simply getting up in the morning because some days, that shit can be hard, especially with a warm as fuck boyfriend who would never admit it publicly but loves a snuggle. You want me to get up from that shit? Na, I’d rather just not wear makeup for the day actually and get 15 minutes more in bed with him. That’s another win for me. Try it tomorrow, find one thing that you did and celebrate the fuck out of it. Doesn’t matter what it is. Could be big, could be small but it’s yours so get the party poppers out bitch, you did it!

Basically, what I am trying to say is

Don’t let anyone tell you differently. Go get after that thing you want. Smash it and do it in your own time. Learn, develop and grow and become the best version of you that you can be. I’m proud of you, look at everything you have done up until this point. You’ve done some incredible, amazing, wonderful things and you’ll continue to do those things, over and over. You are amazing, you are talented, you are kind. Take the time pressure off yourself because cool things happen when you let yourself have time to breathe.

Ok, love you, bye xoxoxoxooxx