Today I am going to be writing about something that a lot of people struggle with; hating their body and how this can put a barrier up when it comes the act of mating.
As someone was has always had body issues, the thought of someone else seeing me naked fills me with utter fear. Even with someone I’ve been with for months, I still panic when they see me de-clothed.
I couldn’t understand how someone could find me attractive when I simply couldn’t see it within myself.
One thing that always went through my head when I was younger was “are they doing this for a joke?”, “Is this to win a bet?”, “What if this is some kind of pull a pig kinda deal?”. I couldn’t fathom that the chubby, scar ridden, inked mess that I happened to call my body was something that anyone could want to touch or see, let alone ravage. The thought was always that it was pity being taken on me, or, because bigger girls are “easy”, as they are desperate for love.
This is still something I find baffling, dude’s up in my insta DM’s, requesting a moment of my time to fuck them, after simply seeing one of my photos. My photo’s online are picked perfectly, filtered to perfection to make sure I am at my most presentable but the reality is some what of a disappointment.
It’s the people who see me in the flesh, yet still want to play hide the sausage. Just pardon? First of all, excuse me sir please get back to your station with girls ten times more beautiful than I. Second of all, why the hell are you even attracted to a mess like me, unless you’re doing this for a joke.
If you’re wondering what pull a pig is, it’s a game where a group of guys go out and they win the game by pulling the ugliest looking woman. Nice right? There is also nail the whale, same game – different name!
What the person who is about to put their meat stick in the ham wallet doesn’t understand is that we can’t standing looking at ourselves naked, we don’t understand why you would want too, so please don’t judge us if we would like to turn the lights off; keep our shirts on and not look you in the eye.
Have you ever wondered why we cover our faces, either with our hands or pillows? Because we are honestly embarrassed. Personally, I cannot bare to see what your response to my naked body is. I can’t bare to see your face twist into repulsion, like mine does when I see myself naked.
How do we combat this? How do we combat the self loathing of ourselves when it comes to having another person see us nude?
First off, don’t let having a belly, scars or anything you hate, keep you from banging off that shirt of yours sis, he/she knows what they signed up for.
Second, remember everyone is ugly to someone, if they think you’re that hideous they wouldn’t be in bed with you sis. They want to be there with you honey, they want to be all up on you; just get lost in the moment. Put your own insecurities aside because maybe you’re exactly what that other person has been looking for. You may not ever understand why they are into you or even why you make their motor turn, but you do, just embrace it.
Stop hating on your flaws. Who said they were flaws anyway? Have you actually received any serious negative feedback? Or are you just assuming people judge you for this?
Sexiness and confidence isn’t just about body. Humour & intelligence are just a few other things that people find sexy. It’s not always about youR tummy, tits or ass, sometimes it’s about your eyes, your giggle, your wit.
Allow yourself to be touched. Let whoever you’re naked with touch your boobs, butt and belly, all the bits they can’t get enough of. Let go of the fact that it’s not something that can be loved, because honey – it can.
Stop comparing yourself to other people, you are you, not Gina from Instagram who posts pictures of her perfect rack. You bring your own sexy, you define your sexy. It depends what you find sexy and beautiful my pals, is it looking great in a pair of jeans? Or is it the sparkle in someone’s eye? Is it someones tongue stuck out whilst they concentrate? Or is it simply the way they push their hair back?
Everyone has their own version of beautiful and sexy, you wont always fit other peoples version. Just remember all the things you hate, someone else loves and you should celebrate all the things that make you different from someone else.